nice belly

21 weeks

I don't like the feeling of my abs stretching... it's not one of my favorites. 

I'm fine in the morning but by night time it gets uncomfortable.

Especially if I drink a lot of water AND eat a lot before bed time. And yes, I LOVE to drink and eat before bed time 'cause I have to wait a whole night before I can get some more :)

My morning weight is still around 59,5kg (I'm about 162cm tall) and my bed time weight is around 60,5kg. 

Not a lot, but I've got a few more weeks to go before we'll see and touch this beast in side me... It's been kicking around every few hours today. Some times I could swear it has a cardio machine in there or a boxing bag?! 

Tomorrow is a fun day for me. I'm driving down to Kotka to check out the humanoid's sex (or is it gender, what ever) :)

I'm hoping for a clear, precise, accurate guess. If they could at least give me 99%? 

It's no use knowing that it MIGHT be a girl but they couldn't tell or that it almost looked like a boy but we'll see... I guess the CLEAREST result would be a BOY with a BIG thingie... that can't turn into a girl later on, can it?

...but what ever they find I hope it's healthy, happy and DOESN'T have any cardiovascular exercise equipment in there!  

Mika Nyyssölä in orange Hammer pants!

YES! Another Mika Nyyssölä dream that even had a sequel the same night!

www.mikanyyssola.fi

I was at a gym party. The dream must have appeared because I missed my old coaches "block party" when his gym moved (about 20m) this winter. They had a full week of great stuff but I was always at work place 1 or 2... :(

www.kuntokeskuskm.fi

The party was mostly just "hanging around at the gym". Some of the big guys did their work outs and most of the ladies were modeling for pictures. I had made different smoothies into little pink shakers (gifts for the new and old customers) and was tasting them... I really liked the one where I had used mixed red berries and vanilla protein <3

Heidi Sorsa was there too. She was organizing the whole photo shoot part of the day. Most of the girls were bikini models but I saw some bodybuilder ladies at the back getting oiled up for group pictures :)

Heidi Sorsa www.fastnews.fi

And... I saw Mika :) way in the back of the gym talking to some HUGE lifters about the essence of "making the weights lighter with your mind"... some crazy zen stuff. (I should ask Mika where he gets this stuff?)

I said "Hi" :)

Mika: Well, hi Miia. You're back :)

Me: Yeah, I heard about this party and Samuli told me I should come and check it out.

Mika: Yeah, great place his has. You know I'm starting up my own gym at a new place too.

Me: Really? Where? Is it open yet?

Mika: It's right by the docks. Easy to find and plenty of parking. It's not open yet. I just need to finish the locker rooms and buy more coffee and it's all done. We're opening next week. 

(I think he meant the south docks right by Helsinki city center.)

Me: Wau. I have to come and train there some day! (I kept imagining this big old dry dock with a lot of space and RAW metal... Lifting areas, free weights, rubber mats, mirrors, crazy Mika-music, all sorts of different equipment, aaahhh...)

Mika: You're welcome! Actually if you're in the neighborhood you can stop by any day.

Me: I will :)

Mika: 'Congrats on the baby :)

Me: What?

Mika: You ARE pregnant aren't you?

I looked down. I was.

Me: Oh! I forgot :) yes, thank you! <3 We'll meet the newcomer by July :) 

(In real life I DO forget about the baby every day... funny. I guess when it grows more I won't forget anymore.)

*** 

The dream jumped to another place for a while. I went driving around town in my Camaro. It was gray now, slick tires and totally different... the driver's seat was normal but I used the same technology as they have in Star Trek to drive that thing. 

www.startrek.com

***

I found my way to Mika's gym. He was right, it was really easy to find. 

It was summer so they kept the big doors open and let the sun light in. The sent of the sea air made it perfect :)

Here and there were people fixing up things, setting weights to their places and checking that the mirrors were clean and straight. Mika wanted everything to be perfect on the opening day.  

Mika: Hey, you made it! 

(He was wearing orange Hammer pants and a black tank top. Every now and then he put his hands in his big pockets and waved the pants around while he made little warm up jumps. Hihii. He was so happy about his gym!)

Me: Yeah, this was really easy to find :) Wow, you're really starting your own gym :) This is amazing... it's so, so, BIG!

Mika: Yes. It's a gym for everyone. BUT... My employees WILL interact with the customers if they see that the lifting technique is dangerously stupid. We even have a free WiFi so people can link up to my gymlog bank and find their work out of the day in there if they want. 

Me: Mmm, that's good. A lot of BIG weight are lifted all over the place. You need a big crew to keep thing nice and clean. You can't have bodies lying around :D

Mika: Haha, no... no bodies. Just tired people with happy faces ;)

Me: OH! You have your own cafe here too!!!

Mika: Yes, we have everything. Even saunas.

... we kept talking about the gym and all its stuff and how he managed the money. He seemed so happy. It was the biggest thing in his life right now :)

I didn't stay long but we had a cup of coffee and went out side to talk in the sun light for a while. Oh boy, do I love having these talks with interesting people <3 

(And I especially love the thing that I can remember them like it was real! ... the zombie dreams aren't fun to remember but these GOOD dreams make up for the horrors.)   

www.pakkotoisto.com

8€

The gym next door doesn't open until 1300. So I'm going for a (nordic) walk and then doing a home work out from www.fitnessblender.com

I could just drive down town and pay 8€ for an hour in some proper gym... but I won't. I have to try these home work outs now and then (I'll be stuck with them this summer) and it's a good idea to test a 30min exercise at home with no breaks.  

I can't go for a "normal" walk 'cause the small roads are slippery and I'll probably just hurt myself if I take any running steps... Stupid weather. Weird year in every possible way! :) 

21 weeks preg.

By next Friday night we'll know what's kicking arond in my belly...
I've had dreams of both kind so what ever we find we'll love it <3

Last night was shit. I woke up around 04:30 when all my dreams stopped. I had to get up again around 5:00 to drink (helped with my belly cramps. I loaded with carbs this weekend.)... Nothing helped my dream lock. I even threw the pillow away and tried every sleeping position I could think of. Nothing helped.
I finally got up around 9:30. Morning weight 59,5kg.

The baby came out on week 20

Last night I gave birth... I'm not sure how the baby came out but it was out.
I thought I had a c-section but  I couldn't find a scar. I knew it did pop out the old fashion way 'cause I didn't feel a thing.

My belly was flat and my six pack was back :)
The baby was sleeping upstairs (we had moved to a new house) and I kept forgetting that it was out now... I left the house several times to do our shopping and to wash the car etc. I came back every time to take the baby with me. Aargh, I felt so STUPID when I forgot it...

I was really forgetful and even forgot it in a cafe (I put it up stairs there too... a nice, small, French cafe with a romantic spiral staircase in the middle). GREAT coffee! <3 I must go there again some night.

For some reason I had tubes attached to my belly. One went across my abs horizontally (20cm long and 2mm thin). Mom said that I needed it to keep the circulation of blood cool enough for my ovaries (?). I had two smaller tubes on my sides (2,5cm long and 2mm thin) to aid with my digestive system. I was a bit worried that they would just snap off from wearing pants but they were really firmly stapled to my skin and I could look at my blood flowing through them. Interesting. I could even feel my own heart beat in them. :)

The last dream of the night had to do with evening dresses and high heels. I had problems finding new clothes for parties. Most of the dresses I tried on were SO short and thin that they showed Everything... But I liked them: Bits of silky cloth put together with chains and leather. The shoes had spikes on them and straps. AND the dresses were on sale: 13,50€ for ANY dress!. I bought the M size in both black and white. I took pictures of them again to show Honey after I wake up... but just like Every time before. I couldn't bring the pictures or the camera with me from the dream world... Darn!

So Saturday

60kgs lifting 60kgs :) I was focusing on my hams and the FEEL of EVERYTHING. Well, everything is still feeling great. I could have just used dumbbells but there were too many people at that "station".

Never a good reason to keep my shirt on in public... gosh I hope we're having a boy. This might be hereditary...

I tried to read my first baby magazine today (I got it from a friend): 

The little baby-humanoid kept kicking at it like it didn't like it :D I almost dropped the mag <3

We watched Escape plan yesterday <3 ...aah, Arnold. He made a lot of "Arnold sounds" in that movie <3 He's so cute.

Maybe we could call our baby "Arnold", or maybe not?

You can do it

20 weeks pregnant and having fun at the gym :)

I'm just over 60kgs now... I added 40kgs to that smith-thingie so it's about 75kgs... I would call that a nice weight for warm ups after I had already woken my quads up in another machine :)

Drowning the dead

I went corpse hiding again... This time we used the arctic sea, heavy chains and dirty ropes.

The weather was clear, just a light curtain of flying ice crystals covered the lower sky so that the sun's rays spread out like a yellow mist.
We were dragging bodies on the ice. Each body was tied to the same long chain with heavy ropes and barbwire. The chain had spiked balls on it here and there and it was getting harder to drag these humans 'cause they kept gathering ice and snow as we went on.
The ice was thick but I could hear it cracking over the sea. Someone in the front yelled: "We're almost there!"

My hands and arms were killing me. I looked at one of the dead bodies. He looked like a wooden puppet... a bit Korean... What?

The man in the front stopped. We were at the end of the ice. The sea made the ice go up and down like a wave. I was scared. What if we fell in too?

The first body was thrown in the sea. A vortex sucked him in and as I lifted my hood I could see something familiar about him. The body we drowned was Stalin. He even saluted us as he sank. The chain yanked and the rest of the bodies were now pulled in by the first one.
I saw a Korean ex-leader, Napoleon and some other dead bodies...

I took a few steps back just to be sure I was safe...

www.green-travel.info

2 years in prison

Last night I got a call... I had been "driving angry" and smashed in to a Saab somewhere. I don't remember doing this but the verdict was in: 2 years in prison. No vacations, no parole, all women's jail with no family room. Fuck.
This dream was looking like shit, but I kept at it.
I went to the jailhouse with Honey just to see how it would look/feel. The sleeping areas were huge rooms with 30 beds and the prisoners were issued used underwear from the men's prison next door. Crappy underwear with holes in them... Shit.
I hated that place and cried to Honey that I didn't want to come here for 2 YEARS. I told him that I felt like I was dying inside :(

It was already my last day on the outside :(
It was summer time in Finland. Beautiful... and sad. I looked around with tears in my eyes to see the beautiful things in life for the last time... (those 2 years felt like FOREVER)
I cried like hell 'cause I knew they wouldn't allow Honey to see me for 2 years. :(

But Honey looked at me and smiled. He said: "Don't worry babe. I'm right here."
He showed me his phone's GPS and moved the map around so that I could see a house by a field... I knew what it was. He had found us a home. He smiled and told me that it was ours and that we would live there... from now on. Then he put his hand into his pocket and pulled out a ring!
(At this point my FUCKING PHONE rang 'cause it was time to get up!! SHIT. I smashed it and kept going...)
Honey had the ring in his hand and put it in my finger. He showed me how it shined in the sun light and he told me he would never leave me. He loved me with his whole heart and that he was going to fix everything <3

The next day I didn't go to jail. I just DIDN'T.
'Cause the next day I started my life as a wife in a house by a field. I wasn't allowed to leave for 2 years...
I didn't want to leave, ever.

I sat by the window and had a cup of coffee with a piece of chocolate cake as a NH-90 helicopter flew by the house. My new neighbor sat with me and asked why the helicopter would fly so close to This house. I told him that Honey always flies that close when he knows I'm home.

<3

(My phone is fine... just a little bit flatter.)

59,5kg

Morning weight: 59,5 kg.
Last dream of the night: zombies (I shouldn't have watched Walking dead again... darn)

Dream:
I was part of a large group of people, "survivors". We had labs, electricity, clean water, gyms, doctors, cars, big buildings and computers... pretty much we lived in a Dick Tracy cafe... (yes, I had the strawberry shake with a lo-oong spoon) Kids were running on exerciser mats to get faster and I saw a small boy getting his back snapped back in shape by a physiotherapist or something. Everyone was in great shape.

A thin, dark haired girl was sitting by the door. She got phone calls and texts from someone all the time. She had a brother on the out side. My dream showed him to me:

He was harassing a small girl on a field. He had already started to change. The skin around his mouth and his eyes weren't doing too well. The little girl was very scared. She kept throwing pieces of her dead mother at the guy (hands, feet, a bit of her neck... No, I DON'T know why she was carrying her bits around).
The half zombie brother had a doctors coat on. He was a top researcher in this zombie problem and he had solved the problem with the virus. He KNEW the antidote!

His sister sneaked out of our building and got her brother in. He wore a face mask so we couldn't see his badly changed mouth. But I knew. I knew he was changing.

He got straight at work to make more antidote. His sister was showing changes now too... her legs were starting to get weaker and she couldn't see well. I don't know why the others couldn't see that there was something weird going on...


    

Oh my... Legs.

No free weights. Well, not alot of 'em! But still I feel like I just got run over by a small elephant. My workday was short so I did my leg workout after lunch... Still now, after work and after my evening (protein) pancakes, I Still feel like I just got back from a week long trip to the jungle...

I know I'm fine and that the bag of eels is fine too. I just need to check my diet and keep an eye on my water intake :)

I might be tired for just not drinking as Much as I'm used to! ;)

The 20th week... here we go!

Well... I had a LONG weekend. So that's all. (School days in Helsinki AND Lahti.)

I can still just and just make a line to the side of my belly... if I just twist enough and suck it all in (all those eels).

It's getting too hard to do any Good pull ups. Sad. I guess my extra weight is just too much.
I weighed in at 61kg tonight at the gym. Oh boy, do I feel huge!
In MY eyes I look huge (and pumped too). But these pics don't tell the tale that I see in the mirror :D

So... which is it?

I feel like I'm full of eels. So we're having eels :)

Tha cat from... hell

Mom has a cat. An Ocicat. A dark cat. His name is Oz. He used to be a gynecologist or a sadist or something in his last life. For most of last night he slept between my legs and kept pushing on my sore adductor muscles. (I didn't have the heart to kick him away) He also kept blocking my legs and snoring and changing his sleeping position and... uuuh. When he FINALLY left he did these things:

- woke up mom by walking over her face
- woke me up by tickling my face 3 times and then showing off his ass hole by doing pirouettes in front of my face and tickling me with his tail with every turn
- ate a piece of the flower that I had brought my mom and puked on the floor in her room (she had to get up like a lightning to save a rug by ripping it away from that darn cat)
- took a huge shit in the kitty litter and sprinted around the flat after he was "empty and light" again
- sang "God save the queen" in horrible cat dialect
- ...and finally tried to kill us by being in our way and under out feet when we tried to walk around and find the toilet

Oz is a normal cat. He just does things a bit more Ozzy style...

Last night in Shangri La

A halfway point with our new humanoid and a "last chance workout"...

I said good bye to my private gym and as my last workout I gave myself a leg day and had some fun with my delts :)

I've taken on some weight (normal for pregnant female) but not badly...

The ultra sound looks like a girl... cat?

I had set the alarm for this morning for 06:30. I hit the "shut the F*** up!" button at 06:30:05. My dream was about my next ultra sound appointment. Honey can't make it this time… I think he's in France? So in my dream we were at my mom's place and she had a home-ultra-sound-gadget! She said it is pretty "strong" so she held it 30cm away from my belly and didn't point at me with it at all… The picture was clear as day. Greenish 3D video played on her telly and I shouted to honey to come and take a look at our… hmm, kitten? The humanoid was totally normal from head to belly, but the rest of HER looked like a female cat. Oh well, we looked at her as she yawned and made faces as she slept. Cute little thing she was <3 Our special kitten.

2 jobs

I work as a masseuse at nights... well for one more week. Then I take a break from my number 1 job and concentrate on my studies on becoming the Best masseuse I can be! (and start working longer days as a masseuse) It gets tiring… 7-8 hours at the office and then 3 hours at the "spa"… I have not been able to push in an extra workout (for the early mornings) 'cause I would get TOO tired to do the shopping, feed the car, look at some crazy dreams, watch my favorite shows on TV, cook food, eat it, pack it, wash myself, wash my laundry, do my "muscle maintenance" and take care of Honey and our family… To be totally honest, if I squeezed a morning HIIT in there I Might be able to make things work, but the truth is that I do NOT want to risk anything this week (yes, it's just one week) nor do I want to make my Honey feel bad or neglected. I'll just forget cardio for ONE WEEK and make sure that I eat well, recover and LIVE and Love and all that other soft yummy stuff too <3 The little humanoid sure loves to dance today…

The other child

I dropped off a pair of skates and a helmet to Honeys son's daycare before work...
I saw him (Honey's son) playing there and he looked hmmm, different. All the furniture is smaller there and there are other kids there too. Maybe that's why he looked a bit hmmm, younger... And I noticed that I felt something in my heart. A small, warm gust of "love" maybe?
Propably just a reflection of hormones since our cub was kicking around behind my abs.
Soft kicks and Really fast boxing seem to be a fun thing. Last night it pushed its head up so that I had a pointy bit in my abs for 15min...
Funny little thing.
I hope it has enough fluid to swim around in. Last week I had to reach for my sunglasses and I squeezed my stomach And its inhabitant to a 2D world for a sec... Sorry babe. I needed my sunglasses.

19 weeks

Ups and downs.
Ups: everything Feels good and the humanoid inside makes me happy <3
Downs: I'm starting to be forgetful... And I'm Only 19 weeks "old"!!?? Horrible. My friend says this might/will get worse. (help)
The weather is pretty shitty... If I want to "kill myself" I'll go for a walk. Thank God for bodybuilding... :)

lifting 50kg, 5 sets 6-15 reps... (upper body day)

59,4kg

... and they all fall down

What do you do when you feel like shit and just need a hug?

Well, if you're alone you can do many things:
(if you're not alone you'll get that hug and every thing's fine... oh yes, even a dog will do.)
 
- go skiing. X-country is my favorite style, my legs just can't handle the skating style and to be totally honest: it's just too damn economical, you burn more calories when you go "off road and in to the deep"
- have a coffee and watch an Arnold movie. My pick is usually either Predator, Commando, Total recall or True lies :) ...and then you have another coffee and vacuum the whole flat.
- stretch your body and mind... sounds weird but it works. It helps to release "nice" hormones and after a little face massage and a pint or water you'll feel and look a thousand times better :)

Why all this, you're wondering...?
I had a bad breakfast. Felt really sick and my hands shook. Belly cramps and weak knees... I couldn't do shit for a few hours and finally it stopped. I didn't know if (what ever it was) would happen again so I relaxed, did all those things above (not in that order) and let the day unfold :)

As a personal note: if I go skiing it will make my female bits and the bones and muscles and All that stuff feel like they're gonna crack and fall off... Uuhh... Thank goodness I like it slow and steady.

subspace dreams

I've had some Weird dreams about this "kitten" inside me... She/he feels like a kitten when she/he is doing her/his (oh fuck this I'm calling it a IT).. when it's doing it's cardio or what ever.

One dream was about Chucky (yes that killer doll-thing). He was my baby, he had a bad rash and was burned half way down his back. He kept bleeding on me and I kept changing his shirt... yighhh-aagg.

In a nicer dream I had a plastic baby. I could pull it out of me through my bellybutton (outchz-aargh!) and push it back in. It was about 12cm long and didn't look alive :( but the doctor said that he was fine and just needed an "air bath" every day for the rest of my pregnancy. No thank you.

Some dreams are truly NICE and sweet to look at. I even wake up happy. The child can be of any age between 2 weeks to 24 years. She is always a girl/woman.

Today I don't have time to get my workout done (2 jobs and all) so I'll just go nordic walking after 8pm. The weather has gotten all "warm" again (-4C) so it gets too hot to run and too cold to walk. (I don't have good clothes, nothing fits right with this belly)

Gosh, do I hope I have some of those NICE dreams next night. Last night was all about training soldiers again and they kept wearing the wrong clothes! They looked like civilians! :( That's not right! Not in MY platoon.... mrrrr...

The 18th week

 

well, someone's been busy growing...  

 

it will get rough when I have a lot more weight in the front... I guess I'll have to start doing some sets sitting down? I don't want to hurt my back. 

 

still enjoying the feeling of Power :) 

metal's 50kg vs. my 60 kg. 

At some point I'll have to cool it and ease off on the Big weights :/

 

dip sets with "extra weight" ;)

 

 

I can still do different lifts and I enjoy doing them. As time goes by I'll change my routine But I will not stop Doing my routine ;)

It's all in the little things at that point and one BIG thing will be to keep my muscles stretchy and soft A.K.A. "get a massage!" :D

a very boring video about my second heart:

it's doing over 140bpm while I'm closer to 70bpm... nice <3

Fetish shoes

She was a fetish model… One of those ladies who you might see in a café and think that she's a singer in a 50's band or a burlesque queen.

She was sitting by an open window as I walked in. Huge breasts, long dark hair with a red flower in it and a strong makeup, like she had just come of the stage. She was wearing lace nickers, jewelry around her neck and stay ups. Her shoes were wicked. I stared at them as she turned around to greet me. Red leather boots all the way to her knees. Tight around the ankles and 5 big, metal clips ran along the sides. The heels were stiletto, 12 maybe 14 cm! The ball of the foot had it the worst: they weren't your usual platform shoes. The part that touched the grown was cut so that it resembled the bottom of a boat. They looked more like skates with a killer heel! :)

She said that she had quit this job earlier but had come back 'cause she really needed the money. Her legs hurt and I could see that it was hard to walk on those shoes. Although they were very tight and made of leather, they would still break both her ankles if she fell for any reason. I stared at her breasts (the stiff style of her walk made them wobble in a hypnotic way) as she difficultly walked over from the window to her mirror and put on her see-through tunic.

I wondered why she kept wearing those shoes but I guess if she took them off between shows, she would have a horrible time putting them back on again.