Monday, November 30, 2015

What if. ..

What if the weather weren't shit and I actually lived in a WARM country. ..
What if my job would leave me with more time to myself and to my hobbies. ..
What if I felt like I was in control instead of just sitting on a bus and waiting for the end stop...
What if I decided to make myself happy and others around me...

What if I just keep chasing my dreams and no matter how scary it gets and no matter how long it takes I Will Make It.

Then what?
...I have reached my goals and made my mark.
So what?
...I'll feel good and find new ways to fulfill my life with joy.
Who cares?
...no one needs to give a fuck. It's all about Me. Even when I stumble and fall flat on my face... it's all for me.
I don't need people around me to keep cheering me on day after day. I don't need constant reminders about looking good or doing well.
Those things make me feel "sick".
Don't get me wrong. I do appreciate a remark here and there when I'm really struggling with my life or just finished a big job or whatever. I just don't need the empty words that are shouted at every god damn sofa pillow or candle arrangement that I've thrown together.

Words wear out. Silence with the right kind of smile is golden ;)

Becoming a Pro

I spent last night hanging out with Nicole Wilkins. She's a Professional athlete and a person I look up to when it comes down to keeping things simple and clear... I follow her on Facebook and once a week I check out her tips on living the fit life on http://www.fitnessrxwomen.com/training/the-fit-life-with-nicole-wilkins/ 

We talked about becoming a Pro.

(Before I went to bed I watched a Japanese documentary about an old couple in Japan who had their own supermarket and they were nearly 80 years old and Still kept up the good work... struggles and all they kept making their dream live on...
They said: ..."I guess to be a professional you have to... you have to make every customer happy... yes. That is it. What else could there be? Make everyone happy... :) " )

Nicole had on light brown gym clothes. Something I've never seen on any one... she looked quite dull and boring :D Nothing had a bling-bling on it or even writing...

She told me that being a Pro is not about the money you make, it's not about the travelling, it's never about the sponsors and it sure ain't in the clothing you ware. We had a long discussion about the meaning behind the word "professional". She showed me Youtube videos and newspaper articles of other people who made a living just like or even better than a (fitness) Pro but -and I quote- "didn't have no freaking pro cards on 'em".

We did a short leg workout before I had to go and look for the best meatball restaurant on the Chinese section of Budapest (I woke up hungry).
Apparently I SHOULD try box jumps 'cause even Nicole has me doing them now. Not just Dana :D
It's a shame my gym doesn't have any boxes to jump on.

Nordic Pro 2014, Lahti

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Them sticks

...did legs yesterday.
Blood, sweat and gas :/
My female plumbing system exploded like a bloody fire station just before I got to the leg press part... crap!

It's that idiot time in my cycle again...

But I finished.
I ripped myself out of the comfort zone on every set and made those last reps count.

Squats with slow reps 80kg...
Walking lunges (short step) with 21kg...
Leg press (superset) 125kg...

It was a good night :)

Monday, November 23, 2015

The old tiger

Whiskers all curled or half cut off, paws bleeding and hungry as hell... all alone in her open cage she slept. Waiting for the next day, the next show, Her next big number...

The circus burned down a week ago. Half the clowns died with it. The other half started doing stand up theater or mime stuff in the nearby park. The parrot had said that people gave them apples.
The monkeys moved to New York and it's public knowledge that they are doing just fine in the stock market business...wau,  who knew?!

The old tiger. She didn't know of any other life. The circus had always been there for her. Her life. Her home. Her daily piece of meat... but now... no matter how she growled and jumped through the twisted metal hoop that once used to burn with a bright yellow flame... no matter how scary and cruel she looked, no one applauded, no one screamed, the scent of popcorn was gone, no music, no lights, no dancing bears or high wire acts :(

She still got in the ring every night and did her great act. She still smiled with her heart at the audience she wished she could see once more and bowed in the end like she had seen the horses do in the cowboy act...
She was the last one left.
The one who couldn't leave. No. Not just yet.
Circus Mumundus. Once a glorious place to live and work, now a burned down dream, a pile of ash and tangled metal bars.

Her tail dragged behind her as she walked past the once joyful and full of life trailer area. Black dust stuck to her tail and back legs. Soon she would look more like a dirty old house cat than a fierce, wild tiger...

The stables were empty except for the bats that had moved in yesterday. They loved the location. Close to a park with lots of insects in the trees.

Some of the horses got movie roles, others just retired and moved down south. The bears cashed in their jar of tips and moved to Montana. (I hear the mountains are beautiful this time of year. And that there's plenty of room to sleep through the winter.)

"I'm so tired..." she knew she couldn't keep this up for long. No memory could keep her alive. She needed to feed. Maybe a rat would wonder before her and she could force it to show her where the meat locker was... or maybe not. The rats left before the fire. There was a rumor that they started it. Playing poker with the local alligator. Alligators don't take losing too lightly.


***

I felt REALLY sad writing this.
Something hit home.

But don't EVER ask me about the old tiger.
I'll rather keep her in her open cage right now.
She'll rip your throat open if you ask stupid things.

And she's not That old. Just over 6 years... In her prime! :)

Friday, November 20, 2015

Crazy massage

That little (Actually quite big) spine-roller really gets you where it wants... I like it :)
I rolled on it before and after. During my back w/o I did some foam rolling and stretching.
That "alien spine twister" helps all over! My traps Love it :) even my glutes got a little smack from that crazy monkey ;)

I did one of those Dana inspired back days tonight and WUUUUUUUIIIIIIIIII did it WORK <3

My local gym:
Kuntokellari is in Valkeala. Right next to S-market :)
Lots of parking and Lots of fun locals. And Me :D

www.kuntokellari.fi


But no roller or other invention can help me like the human hand.
I need a proper massage. A looong massage.
Mmmm.....massage ;)

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Leggies by Dana


I added some abs to the end (2x100) and almost threw up :/

Squats : 80kg
Hack squat : 40-60kg
Leg press : 90-190kg
Leg ext. : 20-30k
Leg curl : 20-30k
Calves : 25-45kg
Crunches : 2x100

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Supps 'n' bench

I went to a supplement store the other night.
Bright red walls and lots of different supps for just about any workout  :)

3 huge guys were talking about stretching and one of them was doing his chest&biceps workout in the store! They had a mini gym in the middle of he store and the owner (a former bodybuilder) let his friends come in and do a workout if they used some of the powders he was selling and if they promised to give their opinion about the products :)

Actually anyone was allowed to do a short workout if they tried some of the products.

....

I'm buying something to take before my workouts. But I think I'll stay away from pump formulas and Too many (different) stimulants. Just something easy like the coffee I've been using :)

Warhouse Gym

It's true.
The Baileys really DID open a public gym this year.

I gotta go to Philadelphia some day.

Not just for the city's history and sightseeing but for a month full of crazy workouts :D

Someday... I'm doing it!

Something Dana asked me

"What are You doing here?"

I was at their gym. The Warhouse Gym.
She saw me on one of the cardio machines and came over... all pumped up and sweaty (Dana, not me). She looked surprised.

I was too early. I guess she knew I was supposed to come and train there this week but for some reason she wanted me to wait...

"Just don't go to the cellar. It's not ready. We're still working on it. I'm sorry about that..."

"No. No worries." I replied.
She walked back to her weights and continued with her shoulder workout.
Rob was in his office... I heard him shout on the phone. (Happily)

...

I had this dream 4 nights ago. I still wonder about it. What was my mind trying to tell me? Or was it a reflection of the future?

What we want the most (and what we work for the most) -> that is what we get in life.
I want to meet Rob Bailey and work with him. On a Big project.
I don't want to work For him but With him.
There's a BIG difference!!! ;) :D

Sunday, November 15, 2015

Sick

It's a sick (news) world out there.
I feel that I cannot help in any big way so I'm going to cool off for a while. I'm going to forget about watching the news for two days and just let the experts do the work.

My 9 weeks with Markus Heinänen are almost over and it's time to look at the results. It's time to learn. :) :)
My main hobby, bodybuilding, has reached another goal.

It's time to set the (next) BIG goal in bodybuilding and to go at it with all I got. (Actually I set it two weeks ago)
Reaching that goal will be an adventure! ;)
It won't be easy, I know it will be a struggle every now and then but I know myself better now. Every year I get better and every workout is different.

I won't set a date (a competition) or prep for a photo shoot. I'm setting a goal weight and a goal physique. I'll give myself a rhythm and I'll keep taking progress pictures.
5 gym nights per week is too often for me (I start to burn out around week 6) so I'll cut it down to 4 x week. If that too is too much I'll just cut it down to 3 x week and add more food.

Small steps lead to big results.

Friday, November 13, 2015

Big step

I took a leap of faith today...
I believed in myself and I pushed back all the negativity in the shadows of my mind.
I might make it, I might not. No matter what happens I know I will survive. I will keep growing and becoming the person I am.

I struggle to be Greater.
It is my right as a human.

The fight never ends.

Thursday, November 12, 2015

My bff

I see you almost every week. We smile and laugh. We sweat and grin. We show our weaknesses to each other and we grow stronger together. We hate it when we have to part in the end and we can't wait to be together again.
It's a love story.
It's a way of life.
It's as good as sex.
I give myself to you and you make me pay for every breath I take in your arms...

...

I miss you.
I was too tired and busy to come to you tonight. It will be too late when I finally have the time... but we'll always have tomorrow.
The next time.
I can already feel my heart racing.
How rough will you be on me?

I'll see you and my blood will boil. I'll touch you and squeeze you with the very light of my soul.
I wish I could spend more time with you.
I wish it was tomorrow already.

Monday, November 9, 2015

So much, too much

Too tired to give a f...
But I got my workout done.
Kept it clean.
Kept it short.
Got it done :)

Life can be a tired, old dragon sometimes but let it have a nap and you got a fire breathing super sheriff on you ;)

...with some killer calves.

Sunday, November 8, 2015

Eye contact

(I wrote this on Friday)
I'm spending the night in Helsinki.
This town (Finland's capital) is both loved and hated by its people... it's built to be nice, warm and inviting with wide roads and market places but it often feels crowded and too small when you ad all the people and (modern, not horse pulled) traffic.
Helsinki is rich with different (and new) cultures but it doesn't live up to its full potential (my opinion). Areas that have giant statues and superior natural parks are totally forgotten and often only enjoyed by their older (retired and lonely-ish) residents.
History thrives all over Helsinki's parks, streets and old buildings but quick fixes and constant repairs to the roads and underground plumbing rip the scenery to shreds with their blinking yellow lights and plastic cones. (Every fxcking year. All year round.)

OOHHH.... The city by the sea, a shiny pearl or a pot of gold to the staggering visitors it hosts every year. Still... so gray and dead most of the time. Is it because of the people who live here or the history it so proudly carries? Pulled apart so many times by the kings of the North and the tsars of the East. Maybe it is the weather?

I lived here half my life until I got older and 50% just wasn't the truth any more.
One of the weirdest things to let go has been to admit that I am not from Helsinki. It's even weirder when foreign people ask where I'm from: "Scandinavia." I say.
I don't like narrowing myself to (just) Finland.

stayed at a friends flat
she has hobbies
and weird antiques
we went to the park...
oh, the beach is open!!
no, wait, it's crowded...
...I spent some time at the gym today. It's father's day in Finland. 

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Bench press 1RM!

I finally had the nerves to just do it.
I stacked 60kg to the bench press, got under it and lifted :)

One rep. 1x 60kg :)

The other one was so close but I was alone at the gym.

It was heavy but it was not hard ;)

I wore wrist wraps and a belt (my back hurt).