Hacked it!

Soooo.... I found the time to go to the gym. (No good milk in the fridge -> gotta go out anyway)

Warmed up with basic squats and jumping around and doing stupid stuff with my arms and. .... aaargh I wanted to get started already! ! :)

I kept it clean and tight on the hack. Slow and deep...

My knees were happy and I sure did get a good feeling in my glutes and thighs but my back felt tight so I gave it a rest and finished my quads with both long and heavy knee extensions...

Motivated

After spending time with my cousin I feel motivated and fired up. The spark in me that wants to compete again has never died but now I feel that it got a ton of gasoline thrown on it :)

Something he said about the hack squat really got to me... if I have the time and energy I'll hit the hack on Thursday when we go back home.
But if I'm too dead tired and under fed I'll save my energy and walk to the (real) gym on Friday.

Uuuu.... I want to pump the Hell out of that hackedy-hack thingie... :D

Grilling and chilling

I took some time off.
It's summer. Enjoy it.

Kiddo and I went barbecuing and finally saw my cousin :)
Gosh he's grown again.
We have a weight difference of 100kg.

He started lifting again. He says that the pump in his muscles as well as his mass grows quickly but his strength is still "gone". He took some time off last year, did more cardio, lost some weight and did longer sets with smaller weights.

Now his slowly getting back to normal and hitting the BIG WEIGHTS :)

...BIG means weights that need 3 spotters to keep things safe! ;)

He did the best juicy chicken! Well his wife prepped it but he grilled it :)
And the salad had the Biggest grapes I've ever seen!

We have to go again and take a cake with us... :)

Body check

59kg...

Unbreakable

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uq2hVOSACFo

I miss Rob. Sometimes I listen to music that reminds me of him.
Not his music. The other kind...

Are you out there? My future...

I've been getting a lot of contacts through my Bodyspace account and on LinkedIn.
It's always nice to meet new people and to hear what they have to say about the world and what they like to talk about when a completely new person is listening. :)

I've been enjoying this "reaching out to the world" side of me.
I feel like my planet is expanding :)

I read a long article today about touching people and living longer. I'm sure it was all true.

I need a massage.
And according to the article, lots and lots of sex ;)

http://valtsuhealth.blogspot.fi/2015/07/sosiaalinen-elama-yksinaisyys.html?m=1

How to train right

This weekend is just as slow but more productive than usual.
I finally got a lot of my over due writing/updating stuff done.

It's been super warm (about 20C) and sunny :)

One of my workouts got messed up 'cause kiddo woke up too early (our neighbour was shouting instructions as she was getting her kids ready for park) but I finished my last sets with him playing behind me. Every now and then he did come up and push the bar down. I'm not sure why. I'm pretty sure I was lifting it. Not pushing it down ;)

He helps me around a lot. When I shake my shaker, he shakes his milk bottle. (Milk flying...) When I clear weeds in the garden, he pulls all the plants up and tries to eat them...(plants dieing. ..)

I'm trying to find a minimum of moves for THIS MONTH. Next month I'll do something different and never will I train more than 4 times per week and I'll always keep the workouts short and my reps super slow.
I don't go through the whole list. I pick about half of the moves and just concentrate on them :)

Santa from hell

Honestly I watched ONE episode of Dexter and now my dream world is full of killers and maniacs :/

***

Killer Santa... that's what they all said. I was a prisoner. There were others too... mostly women. The men got all sent away eventually... to a mine of some sort?
It looked more like a witches lair. Dark rooms and small windows. A fireplace in every room. Ogres and angry dwarfs kept doing rounds so we couldn't mess around or plan to escape. I saw 4 white mice in a box... they had not given up :) They stole stuff every day to build a "key". They had a plan but they would not share. Wise mice :) Never trust anyone.

Santa saw the mice carrying a ball of yarn. That was the end.... He told me to cut of their index fingers and to decorate their box like a xmas tree with them. I was in a small state of shock. How could I fake this. I don't want to hurt the mice... and was I supposed to cut of 4 fingers or 8? I though about making little fake fingers out of candle wax.

I still had time and the biggest ogre was sleeping on the cutting table. He had long, blue dreads and a Jamaican style to talk. Me and another woman started braiding his hair. We told him we liked to touch his hair and he fell a sleep. We tied him to the table with his dreads and ripped all the curtains off the windows. The light scared the dwarfs to the mines and when Santa came back we beat him with his own walking stick. His fake beard fell off.

The sun burned the house and the mice and the rest of us stood on a hill and looked as the smoke started to push out of the mines and our men (all were saved) crawled out to the fresh air.

A rescue helicopter hovered over us. The mice gave the pilot a thumbs up. They knew each other :)


Fxcking Santa. Stay away from my dreams :(

Skitso killer

I was a sniper. Trained to kill. My rifle had pink and yellow bits to it but I was like a machine with it when we trained. The guys laughed at me when I joined the swat team but now they see me as one of them. Just another lost soul.

The papers had written about a serial killer. A woman with a bipolar mind kept torturing and killing young girls. Her "other mind" was over 160kg, but in real life she weighed about 70kg. This fat side of hers made her wear giant clothes and had a limp. So when we spotted her at the airport we called everyone and woke up the mean dogs.

We followed her behind an old and empty plane hanger. She was known for bashing in her victim's face or scull and leaving her to die in a small hole in the ground. We all hated her. Both of her minds...

I listened to the radio and heard our boss talk as he was watching the killer walk around cleaning the hanger where she (supposedly) did her dirty work.

Boss: "...she walks with the status definitely in her both personalities..."

I'm sure he meant by "status" that her bipolar mind was actually just double negative.

Boss:"...take her out."

Snap.

Snap.

I shot her in the head at first but then as she was falling I put another one in her heart. Just to make us all feel better.

We found the last victim. She was dead. Had been for a day now... her forehead was swollen and green pus leaked out of her wounds. We all felt bad for her loss. 

***

It's days since I saw this dream but it still follows me around.

Back to S.A.

A dream took me back to South Africa.
We were there for a party.
The food and drinks were amazing :)
Birds of paradise flew around in the garden and there was a crystal fountain with sparkling pink water. ..

Us ladies were all asked to wear something cheap and ugly for the gala night. We chose to find matching jumpsuits from the nearby mall. The dream took 2 hours and 1,5 of them I spent looking for that hideous "party wear"... gosh. There sure are a lot of ugly clothes in my dream world! !?

If I die today

Kiddo slept for about an hour today (around lunchtime). I got a good workout for my biceps and triceps :)
I had to use a pre - exhaust method but it worked fine!
(Pump yourself silly with the 20kg bar and the finish every set with 5kg or 10kg plates...)

I was hoping to do just a slow and short workout but since kiddo kept sleeping and I had nothing else to do it just felt like the right thing to do: keep working, force yourself to grow. ...

Well I sure got myself totally fxcked up with just an arm workout. ... I'm too tired to do anything more tonight. I just ate and now it's all about playing with kiddo.... thank god he likes Duplos. We can just sit and play for a while :)

About the topic :
I've been listening to motivational speeches on youtube again.
I really do like them :)
It's a good booster when I feel like I don't seem to remember what I want in life ;)

She stole my idea

Two nights ago I saw Dana Linn Bailey again.
She had stolen my idea for shoes. Anti gravity shoes...
She was testing them out and I felt bad about seeing my idea put all the way to use before I even got it off the table.

She was having a hard time making them work. She kept jumping off her warehouse. The idea was right but they needed more work with the specs that needed to be put in to balance out the "pilot's" errors...

Later in the morning I noticed how pumped and happy I was after seeing that dream :)
I had been copied before my idea was even a working product!
This ment that my idea was a sure winner and I should feel good about it :)
So what if I lost the patent and got nothing out of it. Not even my name in bright lights... so what.
I should celebrate the feeling of being so good that people were rushing to "be me" ;D
Funny dream.

It still works its magic ;)

Sulkava

Kiddo and I took a night off and drove over to Sulkava...
By taking a night off I mean we slept together on a small bed in the same room at our friend's house.
It's funny how those kinds of nights always flow the easiest  :)

This town is beautiful  :)

Kiddo ran out of clothes and I made him a skirt out of my old t-shirt.
He looks a bit like a Roman child?...
We called him Micus Minimus.

Drugs and meds

What went wrong with the hormonal pump program...

Dropping the dope.

***

Female hormones don't fit well into my fit female body?
I have to drop my birth control system. It's killing me and it's fxcking up our lives.

I tried to get a doctor's appointment today but there's nothing out there. I'll keep trying tomorrow.

So.... back to basics.

I am back on my way to controlling MY LIFE...

I kept telling myself this weekend that it's all about controlling My Life. Not The World around me.
I am right.
I am me.
And I am not done yet  ;)